So as a professional musician I have been teaching privately for almost 40 years. I’ve also worked other jobs (have to pay the mortgage you know) in insurance and a couple of other areas but the longest has been running a church office…23 years. And guess what…another People Business job! I guess I’m supposed to work with people. Ya think?

Where am I going with this? It’s the biggest education you will get in life after going through college etc. You work 1-on-1 with students young or adult teaching them a skill…singing, playing piano, singing in a group (choir) whilst watching a director. You learn to read that individual student in order to give them the individual instruction that will work for them. One size does not fit all in private teaching.

Working for church? A different kind of people business. There are some wonderful parishioners who support the church so well and happily volunteer for many roles. There are fellow staff members who are amazing! Then there are those parishioners who are “automatic” with attendance, stewardship etc. And then…there is the small group of parishioners who complain about literally everything. And the last group…the handful of parishioners who dump all of their problems on you and blame you for them, and then get angry at you because you can’t solve their problems. Hah!

I always joke that after spending literally my entire adult life in the people business, I have earned my psychiatrist license by now. You have to take a step back from all of this, separate yourself out, and watch the “human show.” Some people tax your fortitude to the limits! You have to be gracious but secretly you’d like to slug them. I probably shouldn’t say that out loud.

But when I’ve looked at the situation several times, I think that church family means exactly that. Think about your own family at home. What good times, atrocities, you-name-it have you endured? How about raising teenagers? No drama there! And how do we handle all of this? We just do. We love our families and will undergo great feats of strength to keep them safe and keep the family whole. We endure numerous issues with children all in the name of helping them grow from child to adult.

Same thing in church. We handle all the parishioners as real people whether they’re bouncing around helping to keep us running or yelping at us because they didn’t like the spanakopita at the annual Festival this year.

And there’s one common denominator between home family and church family…we don’t throw anyone out. We may endure some extremely difficult times but we work to solve the issues. And for those people “acting out” I have always assumed they feel safe. The kids feel safe acting out at home because they know the parents will still be there when the kids are done having an epic drama! There’s still someone to lean on. Same thing in church. The parishioner feels safe knowing that the priest and fellow parishioners will still accept them and their issues, and the church will still be there for them in the future.

One thing this whole scenario has taught me is that just like our home life is “life,” so also is our church life. Religion is life. It’s not just going to church and having Liturgy, praying, receiving communion, going to coffee hour. It’s real life. It’s doing all of the above plus accepting the people for who they are, including the drama they bring with them. Church is life. It’s a safe space. You feel safe because of the presence of God but also because the church family accepts you for who you are.

And I might add that being in the music studio has to feel like a safe place for the students as well. They’re trying to learn a skill. They’re not being perfect. They know the teacher and their parents are looking for progress. But the teacher has to make the studio feel safe for all kinds of issues learning to be a musician. That’s a personal achievement undertaking and that’s a tough one.

How many areas of your life do you feel this safe in? Do you feel this safe in any of them? Hopefully most people reading this feel safe at home with loved ones. That’s more important than being perfect, which none of us are. It’s more important than the fact you actually are having issues! One needs to feel safe to be human. And that includes all of us!

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